a work in progress
Family Portrait explores the invisibility of grief in our American society. Why do we hide from our grief, pain and sorrow (and the grief, pain and sorrow of others?) Why do we as a culture encourage this behavior for each other? What are we ashamed of? I ask this question in regards specific to when the death we hide from is that of a child.
Not until a recent tragic, and horrific loss in my own life, the death of my first born child who was stillborn on March 3, 2007 have I ever questioned the way in which we "handle" death in this country. The traumatic death of my child, and the intense grief and anger that are with me everyday since have raised so many questions about public grieving for me. As a grieving mother I have become an advocate for speaking out about my grief, my pain and my anger. I have not been and will not be quiet about the death of my daughter.
In September 2007 I began photographing myself and my husband at a time when the intensity of our grief was beginning to transform. I sandwiched the images together creating portraits that reveal a struggle of conflicting emotions that are just beneath the surface. The middle image is a replication of this same process, with photographs taken of myself and my husband holding our baby after death. We retain the searing trauma, intense anger and manic pain of the death of our child.
9 comments:
A very powerful and honest statment. I think it will make many people think about an issue that most have never considered.
I think you are very brave to put this all out there. I think it will help change the way people look at the death of a baby--not just the general public, but the rest of us, who are sharing this same experience.
I am living the invisibility of grief, that you write of. Even with my blog...where I am open and honest and myself...I am invisible in society.
I cannot wait to see more of your work!
Wow! I think that is perfect to accompany the photos. And you are right on about society avoiding grief and not quite knowing how to deal with the death of a child or how to be with those people who are. I don't know how to grieve and others don't know how to be there for me. You are working to change how society views this and I applaud you. I really wish I could have gone to be there for you, but Austin is a long way away. Please know that several people where there for you in spirit.
Perfect artistic statement - vividly describes such an important and intensely personal topic.
You are a courageous woman and will impact so many with your words and work.
You have already impacted us here.
What you wrote about your portraits makes them much more meaningful and I thought they were very much so before that. They are some precious portraits about your grief and your love for Birdie. I am glad you are *voicing* how you feel. I wish more grieving people would, I think it would help them (not that I'm in their shoes) and I think it would help others either in your shoes or just help others talk about grieving. I know with my 2 sisters losing their children although I do talk to them I still find it hard, I think mostly because its such a hard as in hurting subject. Honestly I find it hard because I don't know if my timing is bad or if I hurt them more?. I think you are helping me....;) I think of you all the time, I'm grateful you share your wonderful Birdie with us.
This is a great statement. It's true, grief is invisible in society. It's like we're something uncomfortable so they try to get rid of us, shove us in the corner....they need to see us!
Just stopping by to say hello. I found your blog on babyblogorama... I only just lost my son...
The pictures are beautiful, so powerful...
And by the way, your Birdie is beautiful.
Thanks so much for your comments on my blog! I'm Heather from Yummy Sushi Pajamas, but for some reason your comment section makes me log in with my old Blogger name (hlharts.)
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